I think that doctors should be honest about the effect of hormonal contraceptive methods. I was not very knowledgeable about contraception until a few years ago. This was mostly because I had decided that abstinence made a lot more sense than trying to manipulate my body into acting contrary to what it was meant to do. I was right. The hormones are the devil.
Initially, I had considered using a coil. However, the doctor, after recovering from the shock of my virginity [especially at my age], explained to me that inserting the coil would break my hymen etc etc. I also decided that I was not entirely comfortable with a stranger poking around my vagina. I once had to undergo a scan with a vaginascope [is that what it’s called?] and still shiver at the thought.
The good doctor mentioned that implants might lead to continued menstruation, beyond the 7 days I was accustomed to. I did not think much of it at the time. I did not ask about other side effects. I did not think to consider how it would affect me emotionally. Later on, thanks to Google, I was surprised to learn that severe depression was a side effect especially for people who are already struggling with it. I tried to convince myself that I was simply being overly dramatic. Many women use these things and I have never heard of a massive campaign to outlaw them because they make people sad. The mere thought of such a campaign was ridiculous! Yet, month after month, I was sinking deeper and deeper into myself. It did not help that work took me away from home or that I worked in remote areas with limited contact with civilization.
Condoms, I’ve decided are pesky things too. It’s all too easy to have it slip and oops! Baby on the way! Despite all this, I need to make a plan – that’s what I do. To avoid failure or surprise, I plan every detail. It’s like what I did for the wedding, except that did not turn out at all like what I had envisioned. So perhaps I should not plan. Perhaps I should just wing it this time.
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